Tails82
Lord of Terror++
Loyal Vassal
still...sipping?
Posts: 34,371
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Post by Tails82 on Oct 9, 2013 0:16:27 GMT -5
Please send any letters to:
TaiIs82
PM
This site
If you're one of the lucky few your questions will be answered here
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Tails82
Lord of Terror++
Loyal Vassal
still...sipping?
Posts: 34,371
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Post by Tails82 on Oct 9, 2013 1:09:15 GMT -5
Sample
Dear TaIls82,
When I write TaIls82 it automatically sends it to Tails82, how strange.
Anyway my question is; my gum has been swolen for a while now, and I've got bad breath, also I think this is linked to my head aches and also I have some kind of gum disease. I've made it worse by sticking my tonge on my gum and also my finger because I like pressing on it for cause more pain. Pain feels good to me. Anyway I've stopped doing that and I'm now a good girl and only eating on the other side of my mouth. Ive also been brushing my teeth for like 5 minutes. Apparently its related to plaque getting into hard to reach places and then causing an infection. Should I go to Australia for the Xmas holidays?
-Anonymous
Australia sounds like a good place. Jen Beans does not live there. Did you know that Jen Beans? Did you know anonymous sources have called her "silly" and "quite the foolish Beanypants"? Would you trust Jen to perform dental operations on you? I wouldn't. Would you trust her to perform surgery on your kids?
So Australia is okay, as long as it's not Aughstralia. Stay far away from there and from Jen.
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Post by little j ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ ✔ on Oct 9, 2013 5:57:10 GMT -5
Dear 82: I never signed up for your little "newsletter". Please remove my subrscription.
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Post by kode54 on Oct 9, 2013 8:07:03 GMT -5
Same, I'm not interested in that crap.
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Post by Chromeo on Oct 9, 2013 11:53:02 GMT -5
Is this newsletter going to have racist ghosts writing it too?
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Tails82
Lord of Terror++
Loyal Vassal
still...sipping?
Posts: 34,371
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Post by Tails82 on Oct 9, 2013 23:07:46 GMT -5
Please send any complaints to:
TaiIs82 (Re: complaints)
PM
This site
Dear TaIls82,
I have a bit of a problem. I was in the shower and I needed to pee. So I just went in the shower. It was cool though because I was standing up like a boy. Neat. But its ok because it was cleaned up by the water and soap and stuff. But heres the thing. I know if I sit down in the shower Ill get pregnant. Thats where babies come from. But what if I wanted to just adopt? How can I do this? I dont know where to start. Can you point me in the right direction? Also if animals don't take showers, where do their babies come from?
Love, Maddox Cosworth.
Well Maddox, the way I see it you have two options. The first is that you can clean the pipes to your shower and adopt any of the babies you find on the way. Gently shove your fist down the drain, pulling out the obstruction. The likely culprit will be hair, followed by a body if you're lucky. Congratulations you have just adopted a shower baby.
Has JEN ever adopted a shower baby? I don't think so.
Forget about that second option I was talking about, it sucks.
As for where aminal babies come from. Aminals live in nature. Nature has showers too but they do it by their own rules. But just because you can't turn on a faucet doesn't mean it won't happen now and then. We all know April showers bring May flowers. They also bring aminals. Rearrange the letters to May and you get YAM, which is proof. It stands for Yearly Aminal Month. This is when the Aminals come out. That's why in May you get a bunch of those aminals and then they stay around during the summer but then they start running out in winter, but come back in May.
Now I know what you're thinking, what if I'm in the southern hemishpere? The rules go right out the window because the southern hemishpere is covered almost completely by water. Aminals just walk out of the oceans. That's a little thing we call evolution.
TaiIs82,
You rock and are much better than Jen. I was wondering if I should give you one high five or two?
Signed,
Concerned and Very Sexy Citizen
Yeah Jen sucks. Did you know she beans? Tell everyone.
I think when it comes to the amount of high fives you give to someone, it should be from the heart. If your heart says one, go with one. If it says two, go with that. If you're torn between the two, settle on one and a half. That means you gotta split a finger though. Nobody said this would be easy.
I am very glad to receive messages from such sexy citizens who care about our news and the way this country is going. Please keep the letters coming.
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Post by little j ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ ✔ on Oct 10, 2013 3:32:58 GMT -5
Dear 82: What part of "Please remove my subrscription," do you not understand?
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Post by kode54 on Oct 10, 2013 3:53:21 GMT -5
It's simple. Block him, and you won't receive them.
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Post by little j ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ ✔ on Oct 10, 2013 3:54:49 GMT -5
Sure, sure, but I'd like to give him the chance to do the polite thing before I resort to the rude thing.
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Tails82
Lord of Terror++
Loyal Vassal
still...sipping?
Posts: 34,371
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Post by Tails82 on Oct 11, 2013 3:32:18 GMT -5
Please send any complaints to:
TaiIs82 (Re: complaints)
PM
This site
Dear TaIls82,
Why are you being mean to Jen beans? She eats beans, but she is also a nice lady. !100 legit. I think you are being a too many mean to Jen beans. Also did you know she's hot? I'd hit it. I also like her style and dress sense.
Kind regards,
The Nesquik Bunny.
Nice try Jen.
[8:12:43 PM] Alizjiah™: I said maybe because I don't know whats up?
What's up is Jen Beans, up to no good that is. Not maybe, for definite. For definite supers. Did you know she kills vegetables for fun and eats them? How gross is that? Also wears a hat indoors while eating. Very rude.
Why are you doing this, [name redacted]? Have you lost sight of your own humanity? Have you no identity beyond this 'Tails82' character you created in your own mind, to make living with yourself easier?
I believe in you.
And with God's assistance, you will pull through.
I love you, and your friends all love you. We're here for you, buddy.
Here to help.
Love,
Jordan
I am doing this because long ago, 90s...let's pretend it's the 80s though...when I was made by the kindly old man who put me in this body, he gave me a car to play with and taught me "one man can make a difference." And that's what I believe in when it comes to the TaiIs82 Newsletter News. I wanna tell you something. That car was a hot wheels, and it went on many ramps. But not those really cool long tracks with the loops in them, only ones that were like made with books at a 45 degree angle.
I already live with myself pretty easily. I have few regrets. Also, (drags you to the back room behind a corner) you do realize TaiIs82 is me, right? The I is for tax purposes.
Please keep the letters coming folks, it's been great, we should do this more often.
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Post by little j ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ ✔ on Oct 11, 2013 6:18:02 GMT -5
Dear 82: This is your final notice. Stop sending me your newsletters.
I'm also a little distraught at the immaturity you have been putting on display here, especially with regards to your behavior towards Jen.
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Post by Laharls_Wrath on Oct 11, 2013 19:13:54 GMT -5
as I'm curious how many people are legitimately bothered by this and if it's limited to those who've posted here
if it's getting on your nerves I'd appreciate a PM as I'd like some numbers
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Oct 11, 2013 19:41:21 GMT -5
After the third one I just went and blocked his PMs. >_>
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Post by Laharls_Wrath on Oct 12, 2013 0:59:48 GMT -5
my point is that there is a relatively small number of active people here and if half the member base is blocking someone maybe something needs to get talked about
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Tails82
Lord of Terror++
Loyal Vassal
still...sipping?
Posts: 34,371
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Post by Tails82 on Oct 12, 2013 1:07:48 GMT -5
No one's really blocked me.
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Spinning round and round like the deadly hands of a radium clock. 
